blessing

Prayer before Sleep

Cod, watch over me as I sleep
Send me quickly into my dreams and make them good and sexy
Take my sole from my body and let it wander throughout the night
Guide my sole home before the morning light
And let me wake to the best dat of my life
Hamen.

Prayer for Success

Some people just aren't sure about like when it comes to Cod. What words of advice can Cod offer us in times or trouble and need? The answer is: A lot. Below are a list of various famous codverbs that people have been using for a long time (often slightly changed, but rest assured, all these are from Cod himself).

Following the astounding number of calls and e-mails crying out for codite blessings (astounding as in I'm astounded there weren't any), I have devised a list of Codly blessings with which to bless fellow Cod-worshippers, confuse your family, and generally lay with peoples' heads. Now, you too can confuse people in the luxury of your home, with any one of the following blessings*

- May it never snow upon your driveway.

- May the fishine waters of Cod envelope you.

- May your bladder never be full when most inopportune.

And lo, when Seajus was taken to McBetsy, he was asked to perform the ritual of baptism. And lo, McBetsy did move from the meeting locality (which had a nice floral arrangement on the right side... I like the florals), and went down towards the River Yo-Momma-Is-Wet-Behind-The-Ears. But lo, did Seajus hesitate on that very locality with the nice florals and the songbirds (did I forget the mention the songbirds? Yes... it was the music of the songbirds that inspired Beethoven to compose his Sonnets and Mozart to write his symphonies.